09
Feb
12

Red Plaid on the Red Carpet!

Oh boy, oh boy!  My very first Red Carpet event!

(Say that like in the Bugs Bunny episode, “Foxy By Proxy“, to get the proper feel of the dialogue going on in my head.)

“Oh boy, oh boy.  I’m going to catch a fox and cut his little tail off….”

(The quote happens at 1:10, if you don’t have time to indulge.)

I wonder how many folks striking poses last night watch cartoons on a regular basis, besides me?

I actually looked a bit like Elmer J. Fudd last night!  And Hubby matched, though his jacket was a bit more elegant.

We blend on the Red Carpet, like "My Cousin Vinney" did!

There were television crews, and microphones all around asking me questions~  I just flashed my “Who the F%^& is Linda Chorney” T-shirt to identify myself.

It was a blast.  Really!  Thanks Grammy Glam, CoverGirl Olay and Venus, at”MyHouse” for having me!

And I met a movie star!!  Bai Ling!   She was gorgeous in person!

I even had VIP parking.  Security looked at me and my plaid, questioning my celeb stat, but I had my papers!  Yeeeeeeehah!  Nominee coming through…

(Now I have the theme song from “The Jefferson’s” in my head.)

I was never much for these big events of who’s who.   But now that I am WTFI Me, folks actually want to converse with moi.  (But I am still not nuts about loud techno music and screaming to have conversations.  What?)

There were glamorous models walking around, and lots of semi-regular people, like me and Scott.  And fancy displays of these museum pieces of art!  Oooh, Ahhh!

Rembrandt's Razor

And Free drinks!

I planned on not drinking, until after the Grammys.  But after the Red Carpet first run, which basically happened right after I walked into the party, I had to grab a glass of  bubbly!   (Now I am hearing Carly Simon‘s first line in “You’re so Vain“.)

I looked at Scott, as I stepped on the carpet, and whispered in a panic, “Do I have any snot on my nose?!”

I hadn’t even looked in the mirror before walking in!!

In the afternoon, I had a photo shoot for an upcoming article.  I still don’t have a make-up artist for Sunday.  But fortunately, I went to my girlfriend’s house, the sexy Sammy Phillips, and she is a model, amongst having other talents!  I’ll be on her radio show this week!  So she hooked me up, and did my make-up.

On Monday, while packing up to drive to L.A., on the last bag I was loading into the car, I PULLED MY BACK OUT!!  No!! Not this week!!  Yes, this week.

So, I had to take a pain killer, to endure sitting in the car for 8 hours.  At least the border patrol didn’t bust me, especially when they asked if we were American Citizens.  I said, I’m Americana!  (So, I thought for sure that they would deport me!)

Then I had a wicked awesome massage at Massage Envy.  If you are a massage monger, like I am, that place is affordable, and really great!  I swear, I could get rubbed 24-7.  Going to Thailand is awesome for that! (No, not that.  Real massage, for 5 bucks an hour!)  I love Thailand!!  I highly recommend it.  Delicious food, beautiful, sweet people, culture, and stunning landscapes.  But most of all, FIVE DOLLAR MASSAGES!!!!

I called ahead from Tucson, to San Diego, where we stopped for dinner, and booked it.  (Nice meeting you Igor!)

Regardless of how good it was, I still got no sleep that night.  Still in pain, and hope if my name gets called, that I can actually walk to the stage!  And still rather excited.  Not a good combo for a good night’s sleep.

So, after the photo shoot, I took a power nap, with my make-up on; rolled out of bed at 7:30, and went to this Red Carpet event in my flannel shirt, (It’s cold and rainy in L.A.!  WTF???). jeans, wtfi Linda T shirt, and some cowboy boots.  And I had the same make-up on, untouched!

At least I brushed my hair!  Or should I say hare?  Waskly Wabbit!

P.S.  The folks we are staying with for a few days, I met in Thailand!  On their honeymoon!  A romantic story, of the three of us, that I will share…later.  (Me crashing their honeymoon, not a threesome, so simmer down.)

AHHHH!  P.P.S   I just found these pictures on line this morning!!  Wow!  Look Ma!  I made it to Hollywood!  

And after Forbes posted the shot of us as “Linda Chorney and Guest”, Scott just told me he is going to be like Cher or Madonna, and have only one name…..”Guest”.

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Linda Chorney


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