How cool is this??? Hello Liverpool!
I had written the entry you will find down the page a bit, whilst sporting a hangover, post meeting Sir Paul. Then I took it down. I figured, I should get over it.
Below is the original story of how I got to shake Paul McCartney’s Hand…
But for the true Beatles’ lovers out there, I am reposting the Epilogue, for you may appreciate it, and understand the anguish I felt. And maybe get a laugh at my expense! (I am pleased to report that I am presently healing.)
Those of you that just know a couple of their albums, maybe have a “T” shirt, it might not be of interest. But if you have lived and breathed the Beatles since you were a fetus, and have not stopped singing Beatles’ songs, and know every single word! READ ON! I need your advice!
(And just to clarify, we all have lives, we don’t live for the Beatles. They are part of us. In our blood. They live in us. We are not psychos. They are just the greatest band, and songwriters to ever hit the planet. Unsurpassed.)
When I was having my melt-down 3 days ago, what really pissed me off was my two friends that said “Everyone feels that way about the Beatles.” I beg to differ. If they did, they would have wanted the picture just as badly as I had.
Sure we all remember exactly where we were when we heard the news of John and George, oh boy. But, there are a group of us that feel more, breaking down, balling our eyes out, losing 2 of the fab 4. Part of me died, too. (Oh shit, here come the water works again!)
I am not trying to be a brat here, (well, maybe a little), but I have recorded with the same folks that have recorded with John and Paul on their albums! (Hugh McCracken, for example). I just covered “I’m Only Sleeping” on my latest, and I recorded it where Paul has recorded – “Sear Sound“. (I mentioned that in last article.) If you click on the song, you can hear it. Would love your take on my version.
It has been on the radio here in the States!
Do you guys get “Breakfast With The Beatles” there?
Hosted by Chris Carter. Wicked Awesome show every Sunday.
My studio will just have the shot of me sniffing the bench where sat Paul’s Posterior.
And It’s not that I worship the ground they walk on, (or the bench they sit on).
Beatles are primarily human.
I worship the music.
I even taught a Beatles song to a tribe in Africa! (or at least made my best attempt!)
Another song on my new album “Cherries” mentions the Beatles. The verse goes:
“Life’s a great big bowl of cherries, sometimes bittersweet
But you taste all you can, and embrace all the love, and avoid all the hate
And never hesitate to wear my heart out on a limb
And laugh and be silly with my friends
And sing at the top of my lungs my favorite Beatles songs
Oh, cuz we never know when we’re gonna go
But what will come, will come no more, when we’re gone.”
And the fucking photo opp is gone!
You are all cordially invited to my Pity Party. But it will be fun if you are a member of our special tribe of diehards.
(Let the Re-posting begin…)
DO NOT READ BEFORE READING YESTERDAY’S BLOG “Today I shook Paul McCartney‘s Hand” or it won’t make sense. Actually, even if you have read it, this might not make sense.
It’s 5:30 a.m. I have been tossing in bed for 2 hours. I went out and got drunk last night. I tortured myself by reliving the moment at the crossroads, where I made the decision to turn away from the Paul Pic chance.
This is what went through my mind during the decision making, yesterday, at 2:40 p.m.ish…..
Picture, if you will, the cliché scene of said human having an angel pop up on one shoulder, and the devil on the other.
Devil: “Hmmm. Do you really give a fuck if you ever see this woman again? You’ve only met her 4 times. Trash this friendship.”
Angel: “Well, she did tell you Paul was over there. You wouldn’t have known”
Devil: “Yeah, but she wouldn’t have even gone over there if you hadn’t encouraged her, and accompanied her, Just do it. Go back there!”
Angel: “Your snobby Hampton friends are trying to be polite, and act super cool about the whole thing. Mind your manors.”
Devil: “Fuck that! It’s Paul McCartney. It’s the price he has to pay for his fame. He’s bigger than Jesus, and taller!”
Angel: “Now, now, Linda. Your friend had conditions in the beginning of this event for you not to ask for a photo.”
Devil: “Yeah, but this is your idol. And then after, she wanted to go back for a photo, in immediate hind sight, but she chickened out, thinking it would be tacky. Plus they asked for her contact after the gift. It wasn’t her last chance. That was selfish! When are you ever going to have this opportunity again? Plus, she TOLD you “YOU CAN’T GO BACK THERE”. She didn’t ask. What? Does she own Paul McCartney? And no one tells you what you can’t do. You’ve got massive balls. Get the photo, or it will be a living hell!”
Angel: “Shut the fuck up over there!”
Linda: “Yeah, the moment with Paul was so brief. Plus, I’m getting fucking old. When I am senile, I won’t remember the moment, but the photo would surely jog my memory. It looks like I might have to tackle my friend. This is really pissing me off. Fuck! What should I do? Both of these girls are giving me shit. Should I waste friendships to get a photo with Paul? A real friend would understand! And if my parents saw a photo of me and Paul, it would bring them so much joy! That’s worth a potential, tacky, embarrassing moment. What’s the worst thing that could happen? He says, No? I’m sure Sir Paul would get over it. Mom and Dad have been playing Beatles albums in my house since I was four! I know every song. I learned to play Blackbird on my guitar when i was seventeen…It was a very good year.”
Devil: (He is singing the melody from “When I was seventeen”…)
And now your 51, could be a very bad year
Could be a very bad year for not going for it all,
go get the picture with Paul,
what happened to your balls,
if you don’t go, you’ll bash your head against a wall
could be a very bad year. la la la la…
Linda: “Fuck. Alright! I will walk away. But I am not happy about this. I need a moment.”
…Then I needed those drinks, and now I can’t sleep or shut of my mind. I feel like crap. Might as well make myself laugh!
(Unless you are a true Beatles Aficionado, you will not get the rest of my insane conversation in my head right now…If you are, please sing along. It will be a fun game to figure out what tunes I am using for my new self-pitying lyrics! Yay!)
(Now the sun is rising, as I’m writing, hung over..6:00 am. Aug 25, 2011)
Angel: “Good Day Sunshine!”
Linda: “Bang bang, Maxwell’s silver hammer came down on her head, do do do do.”
Devil: “When you get older, losing your hair, many years from now, will you still be regretting not getting the pic, and tellin’ that girl it’s too bad, you don’t give a shit.”
Linda: “Help! I need a Lobotomy” Help!”
Angel: “Your day breaks, your mind aches, you find that all the words of kindness are worth more than having Paul’s photo with you”
Linda: “You wanted it, you needed it, and yet you don’t believe it when you said, I’ll do as she said, Examine your head”
Devil: “And in her eyes you see nothing, no sign of Paul behind the tears, cries for being a douche, a photo that would have lasted years”
Angel: “It’s getting better all the time. Bettah, bettah, bettah!”
Linda: “Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away, now it looks as though they’re here to stay, can I do over, yesterday”
Angel: “Picture yourself in a boat on a river, with tangerine trees and marmalade skies”
Devil: “She say no, I say fuck you, she say tacky, and I say fu-huck you. Oh no!”
Linda: “Linda, dumb bell, these are words that go together well, my dumb bell”
John from the Grave: “Imagine no picture of Paul. It’s easy if you try, No reason to keep bitchin’, time to let it go bye bye”
George from the Grave: “I don’t know why-hi-hi, you didn’t take the picture”
Ringo: “They’re gonna put you in a straight jacket”
Linda: “When I wake up early in the morning, life my head, I’m still complaining.”
(How the fuck am I gonna to end this?)
Angel: “And in the end, the love you take, is equal to the love you make.”
Devil: “And in the end, the picture you didn’t take, is equal to the biggest mistake you make.”
Linda: “And in the end, the photo I grasp, is sniffing the bench where sat Paul’s ass. Ahh Ahhhh…bant ban na na na na na NAH!”
1) Should I have listened to the Devil or the Angel?
2) If the Devil made me do it…do you think Paul would have been an Angel and said “Yes” to take the photo with me?
Cheerio! (I’m trying to act English)…(I know, Sod off!)